At long last, genuine Change™! Get ready to party like it’s 1992!

19 November 2008 | posted by Bierce

No more politics as usual, America. You boldly voted for change and Lord Obama is ready to deliver it to all of you hope-starved teeming masses aching to touch the hem of His garment.

In implementing his revolutionary strategy of Change™, His Majesty has brilliantly decided to employ the ancient precept of the more things change, the more they stay the same. So it’s out with old and in with the older!

The Politico is . . . → Read More: At long last, genuine Change™! Get ready to party like it’s 1992!

Categories: Barack Hussein Obama II, William Jefferson Clinton
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Racism is dead. Long live Racism™!

5 November 2008 | posted by Bierce

Requisite formalities assumed, a black man has reached the pinnacle: the presidency of the United States.

Congratulations to that black man, Barack Obama.

Two questions —

Does it really matter what color he is? Will Jackson, Sharpton, et al., lay down their bullhorns, disband their organizations and declare victory?

The answer to both questions: Of course. Not.

We at Applied Cynicism couldn’t care less about skin pigment. Obama would be equally scary if he looked . . . → Read More: Racism is dead. Long live Racism™!

Categories: Barack Hussein Obama II, Media Accomplices
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Messianic Days

4 November 2008 | posted by Bierce

It’s official.

The election confirmation is over. The ascendency begins. His Eminence shall reign. Every knee shall bow. Every tongue shall confess.

In the meantime, we have become Death, Destroyer of Ourselves.

A special thank you to the idiots who have fallen for the yawning emptiness of Hope and Change. Your inability to see through the veneer will continue to be a potent weapon for change indeed. The true power of your ignorance is about to be . . . → Read More: Messianic Days

Categories: Barack Hussein Obama II
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